~~~ Anxiety ~~~

Past few days I suffer from a very very bad migraine and it last for a few weeks just that the past few day is the worst ever!!! Goshhhhh I keep feel like puking..... and that is why I keep on suspecting that I might had a tumour in my brain... I was very worried .... Then back on monday nite, I started to dreamt of my relative that had pass away, they were smiling at me and waving at me.... and I've a strange feeling that they wanted  me "to join them"..... and then on tuesday nite I dreamt of my late daddy ..... he hugged me tightly and he told me that he miss me so much and then he dun wanna let me go.... I kept telling him that I have to go now I still have to take care of mummy and ah gal and yet my lover haven accept me.... I dun wanna leave her so soon!!! When I woke up I knew that wasnt a dream and it feel so real!!! I keep on thinking of the dream. Is there any hint in that dream?? Perhaps I might not live longer in this world anymore??? I was horrified  =' (
And the next day I told JJ  that perhaps I cant wait until the day she accept me, and yet she keep on scolding me think too much... I really hope that is I think too much.... I did asked: if anythg happens to me will you accompany me to faced it even though now we haven been together?? And she answered YES!!! That simple reply really touch my heart!!! I felt so so happy to have her in my life... I really love her so much ..... but recently she is so emotional due to her bf keep quarrel with her and yet treated her so so cold..... They've been together for almost a year and yet they keep quarrel.... I did told her that if you guys keep on quarreling I can assure that ur relationship wont last long cos I did encounter that situation before.... If I am selfish enough I will make them break easily but I dont wanna see JJ sad.... No matter what happen I will always support JJ and will keep comfort her when she is sad.... I will remember all the promises that i had promised you!! I will not give up you JJ!!! I wanna spend my life - every single seconds with you JJ!!! JJ I am very sure that you are my true love, although you were not my first gf but you will be the LAST!!!! JJ I love you .... If we really got together then I am sure that I will not make you unhappy and keep on making you feel like the first time we date ^^